JUNE 16

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What a whirlwind of a day! Finals started today for the kids at my work. I get just as stressed out as they do. I know how hard they’ve worked and I want to see them succeed.

I had my final pre-op appointment with my surgeon. Fist off, I love his nurse. She is so reassuring. No matter how I’m feeling, she let’s me know that it is absolutely normal. And that makes me feel better.

My surgeon was so much more talkative today. He explained the risks of the surgery and walked me through the process that will happen at the hospital. I had thought that I would only be in the hospital for one night, but I will actually be there for 2-4 nights.

We (tentatively) scheduled surgery for June 16! Of course, it is dependant upon our insurance approving the surgery. I’m not really too worried about it though. I was given a binder full of information about eating after surgery. Reading materials to get me through the next month!

After that, I met with the nutritionist to discuss the diet that I will follow for the two weeks before surgery. We also discussed the diet I will follow after surgery.

I am really excited about this. But I’d be lying if I said I’m not scared out of my mind. This is a surgery that has risks. There are things I will never be able to do again (binge out on pizza). At a certain point though, you have to stop and evaluate the life you are living. I’m absolutely willing to give up those things. For my husband and kids. For my future grandkids. But mostly, for me. I was to be selfish and take care of myself so that I can be around to see the accomplishments of my kids. I want to be healthy enough to takes walks with them. I want to have the energy to keep up with them.

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I will never look like the girl in magazines. And that is just fine. I will look like me. My heart will shine bright and cast away the darkness that I hide behind now. The darkness of shame, self hatred, regret. I will have my life to live. When I think of it this way, what other choice do I have?

Published by: CurvyFitFabuLOSS

My name is Jessica Wolfe. I am the wife of an incredible man and father. He and I have been together longer than we have been apart. We have two sons, one is 18 and a freshman at Indiana State University majoring in Music Education. Our 13 year old son is in the 7th grade and is being home schooled. My vertical sleeve gastrectomy surgery was on June 16, 2016. My total gastrectomy was March 3, 2017. I’ve recently found out I have a fairly large benign tumor in my brain. I also have something going on in my lower spine between my L5 and S1. It seems as though surgery is imminent. Through this blog, I share my life with you and am brutally honest with myself so that when I do look back, I can see what it was that made me make the decisions I did. I also welcome opinions and questions as it challenges my thoughts and helps me grow from where I am. If you want to check me out anywhere else, please do! Instagram: CurvyFitFabuLOSS Snapchat: Momma_Wolfe717 Email: CurvyFitFabuLOSS@yahoo.com

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